Comment from a gay surfer. Is it wise to come out?

black and white beauty #4Hi, friends and readers:

Yesterday, I posted a comment from a closeted teenage skateboarder. I also voiced my opinion on young men coming out to family and friends. My advice was: do it as soon as you safely can.

Needless to say, the post generated a whole slew of comments from skateboarders,  surfers, and even BMX riders — some gay, some straight.

The straight guys mostly said what they have before, i.e., “there are no gay surfers or skateboarders.”

Yeah, right, uh-huh . . . . Then how come I keep hearing from so many of them? Look, a gay boy or man can grind or shred waves just as well as a straight guy. The belief that gay boys/men can’t be “tough” is total . . . bullshit.

surfer #12The best comment I received was from  Evan, a surfer from Southern California, who said this:

“I started surfing when I was nine, long before I knew I was gay. I always knew I was different, but I didn’t know exactly why. Anyway, I never let being gay stop me from surfing. I do as well as all my straight buds. I’m seventeen now, but I haven’t told anyone I am gay, except for one guy I know from school who’s openly gay. We have never dated or anything. I just talk to him on the phone sometimes because it helps, and I know he’ll keep my secret safe.

“Why don’t I come out to my parents and friends? Because I don’t know how they’d react but I’m pretty sure they wouldn’t feel too good about it. As far as I know I am the only gay dude in my surfing posse. I hear the words “gay” and “fag” all the time on the lineup. Also my parents are conservative. They go to church, vote Republican and all that. I don’t think they’d  kick me out of the house or anything like that, but I think things would become very uncomfortable for me if I outed myself, so I won’t.

“Call me a pussy or a coward, but for now I’ll stay in the closet. That’s my choice and I hope you can respect it.”

sunsetH-m-m-m. Well, of course I can understand Devin’s decision. It’s a personal one, and he’s in the best position to make this choice. I just hope one day he’ll summon the courage to be himself.

It’s been an easy day for me. I worked on a writing project this morning. For lunch I brought Cuban sandwiches to a friend in nursing home, where we shared them and chatted for an hour or so. Then I visited a golf course to hit balls and practice my putting. The weather today was beautiful: sunny, cool, and dry, with a light breeze, perfect for golfing. My boyfriend’s working tonight, so I’m on my own.

Have a nice Thursday night, friends.


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